Co-Authored By Andrilisa Read
I used to be the most depressed person I knew and now I’m the happiest. All people have different definitions for what a successful life experience is. The only reason I have desired any particular circumstance or material item is that at the core I believed it would make me feel happier. Over time I realized that success is happiness. Happiness became a personal art and learning its skill provided the most profound benefit out of any endeavor I undertook. These have been my discoveries along the way…
Find The Best Feeling Thought
I used to think my emotions were pointless as if they didn’t have any purpose. I deeply pondered this question and after doing some intense soul searching I had an epiphany- that living for good feeling emotions is what life is really about. There’s nothing more important than happiness, so dedicating every waking moment to my personal joy, the happiest, became the best venture I could launch! I decided that I deserved and wanted to be happy. At any moment, we have access to a wide variety of thoughts, some feel better, some feel worse. The goal for me was to keep choosing the best feeling one I could find. Like a ladder, I felt myself progressively climb into better feeling emotions on the spectrum. The more I actively chose these better feeling thoughts, the easier it became to maintain them. As I continued to do this those happier thoughts became prominent, natural and easy.
Uplift Those Around Us
I’m always blown away by the impact we can have on people. Giving love to people has an effect that is without words. I was at a take-out restaurant, I had walked a solid mile to get there. After ordering all my food, I realized that I didn’t have my wallet. Just as the realization of me having to go home empty-handed started to set in, a complete stranger behind me decided to pay for my entire meal. “Pay it forward” was all he said. That moment of compassion deeply influenced me to be more generous. I learned then that whether it be a compliment to the cashier or positive encouragement of a friend’s dreams or going out of my way to make someone feel special, it could make a world of a difference in someone’s day. I started to give something positive to every person I met with the hopes that they would give equal positive things to 10 more people, who would then pass it forward to 10 more! It’s like a Butterfly Effect of positivity. As a bonus, doing all this also made me feel great! Everyone is looking for love and affection, be one of the blessed few that shines that onto the world!
Wake Up Happy – Set The Day Up For Success
I never used to focus on the beginning of the day. But then I started to notice that the days in which I woke up happy, were followed by a series of good experiences whereas the days in which I woke up not-so-happy would “go to pot”. Clearly there was a connection between those first few moments of the day and the trajectory of the rest of the day. The first few minutes of my day became the most important. It was during this unique time in which I could imprint my desires into the formless substance that makes up this world. This was the time to choose who I wanted to be. I could wake up tomorrow with a new life. If could become happy early in the day, the likelihood that I would sustain it throughout the day was huge once I got the hang of it. This has the greatest effect to effort ratio out of any point of the day. This is because as the day unfolds, our thoughts will naturally stay on the track we start them on. By choosing happiness and doing anything to get ourselves into a powerful high and elated feeling, the effect on our life over time will be massive.
Bring In The New
There was a point in my life when I used to do the exact same thing every day. Monotonous, repetitious living made me feel like I was withering away. I wanted to feel more alive. I decided one of the easiest ways to feel better and to move my life forward was to engage in very different things than what I was used to. I started taking time during the day to do something completely unique every day. I tried a new food that i wasn’t accustomed to. I started doing yoga and meditation. I took a different route. How can we grow if we don’t change into something new? Growth is the actualization of new choices. Have you noticed that a lot of times it’s doing something for the first time that we have the most fun? We need to make that part of our lives. We can change the habits of our minds by installing new ways of thinking. I began to see the world in a newfound light. The future is bright.
Let Go Of Responsibilities
Growing up I had a mental list I always felt I needed to get done. An artificial stress would rule my day until I realized I didn’t actually have to do hardly any of it. I was focusing so much on completing these inconsequential tasks that I lost sight of my personal freedom and joy in the moment. If the laundry didn’t get done, no catastrophes would happen. If the dishes didn’t get done, things would be fine. If we can’t make it to that obligation, our world will keep turning. I let go. Work was fine without me for a few days. I took time to soothe myself. This whole life experience is here to thrill us and to make us happy. Happiness has to be our number one priority. What we focus on, we get more of! Focus on the pleasure of life.
Putting Myself First
We are the most important person in our Universe. We are magnificence in human form. Once I was able to let go, I found that I have a tremendous light to share with this world. So I began to treat myself that way. Like they say before takeoff, “Secure your oxygen mask before assisting others.” The more I gave to myself, the more I had to share with others. Oprah can give everyone a car because she gave to herself enough to have that influence and wealth spill over to others. When we love ourselves, we can let that love spill out onto every person we meet! Giving to ourselves will make us healthy, happy, and enthusiastic about our lives. That’s why you are the most important person to give to.
Zachariah Bourne is a personal development coach and author of the upcoming book “The Most Important Skill”. Zachariah is a positivity enthusiast based in NYC.